Your Life Doesn't Have to Stop With a Reactive Dog

Heidi is our 2 year old German Shepherd, and she is a sensitive soul who is not comfortable around people or dogs she doesn’t already know. She expresses that discomfort in a very loud and disruptive way - because she would like those strangers to go away now, please.

Our family had plans to make our dog a big part of our life and to bring her along with us anywhere dogs were allowed, but Heidi is who she is, and her need to feel safe is valid, and so for a short time, our world with her became very small, because we did not yet know how to safely include her.

Since she would not do well in a boarding environment, and since managing her reactivity is a lot to ask of a pet sitter or friend, we also passed up any activities that would take both of us away from her overnight, thinking we would go on with our life once Heidi had overcome these challenges.

But Heidi may always have these challenges, and adapting to them IS our life with her. She has made a lot of progress, and we have all worked hard to build her confidence and help her cope with stress, but she is still a reactive dog.

Yet, life does go on! Last weekend, we took our first trip as a family to upstate New York for a wedding. We traveled for 9 hours in the car each way and stayed for two nights in an AirBnb. Heidi got to explore nature in the beautiful Hudson Valley and her people got to participate in every part of the wedding! Heidi’s need for distance from strangers was considered at every step of planning, and every one of us had an amazing time!

So here are Heidi’s tips for going on with your life with a reactive dog. Everyone with a reactive dog has their own unique challenges and some dogs may have more limitations than others. It is always important to read your dog's body language and determine what their thresholds are for exposure to new situations, people, other animals, etc. Any time behavioral questions arise, it’s important to first consult your vet to make sure no medical issues are present, and work with a certified trainer to guide you on what training and exposure decisions to make with your unique situation.

1. Hire a dog trainer that can help you in person one-on-one. You are looking for someone who can understand why your individual dog is reacting and bring you up to speed on canine body language so that you can start to build patterns into your life that will help you navigate it with your reactive dog. You are not looking for someone who uses pain, fear, or an e-collar to suppress reactions. Heidi recommends Max Machon to all reactive dogs in the Toledo area, but make sure to look for someone certified in dog training by an independent organization, who uses positive reinforcement training methods. A good dog trainer will look at your individual situation and meet you where you are, and help you come up with achievable steps toward your goals.

   
   

2. Have a support network for you. Managing reactivity is hard, and can bring up some big feelings for people, which are also valid and important. Having people around you who can engage with you thoughtfully about your struggles can help you feel less isolated. This can include friends and family, other reactive dog owners, counselors or mental health professionals, or online support groups (just be wary of online dog training advice and run anything you want to try by your trainer first). I needed a lot of help to find peace with our situation, which was essential to going on with our lives, and that help came from people who were nonjudgmental and willing to understand why I was so affected by what Heidi was going through. You are a complex emotional being caring for a complex emotional being, and you deserve this support.

   
   

3. Have a support network for your dog. It can be challenging to identify the right vet clinic, the right groomer, the right dog walker, and the right trainer for your dog, but it is worth it to find and keep these people in place so that you are prepared for whatever comes up. A trainer can help you introduce your dog safely to the people who will be caring for them and help you adjust when those people sometimes have to change. Heidi’s support network also includes her Safe Circle of humans and dogs who can join her in activities that help us make our family’s world bigger. They go swimming together, learn AKC Rally together, and last year they all took pictures with Santa together.

   
   

4. Seek out opportunities for your dog that don’t include their triggers. Heidi is reactive to strangers, so instead of staying in a hotel with the rest of the wedding guests, we booked a dog-friendly AirBnB for our trip that was secluded and far from other residences, so that she wouldn’t see other people or hear them going about their lives. We researched the lowest traffic outdoor spaces where leashed dogs were permitted, and had a few backups in mind in case we ran into too many people at one of them. When we were driving, we chose rest stops that had large grassy areas at a distance from the bathrooms and parking lots, and when we had to stop at a store, we parked in an area without any other cars, sometimes in a different parking lot altogether!

   
   

5. Teach your dog to be comfortable in a crate, and use a crate cover. Heidi has used her crate since she was a puppy, and we have always closed her crate cover to help her relax in there. She is from working dog lines, and this is a signal to her that she’s off the clock and doesn’t need to patrol her environment. Now, it is a portable safe place for her. We brought her crate with us on our trip, and the cover made the unfamiliar environment disappear for her, making it possible for her to relax in the AirBnB while we were away at the wedding. We gave her a frozen Toppl filled with tasty canned food each time we asked her to be in there while we left and her GPS tracker told us she was sleeping.

As she began to show reactive behaviors, our vision for Heidi’s world became “small enough to be safe but big enough to be fun”. She cannot come with us everywhere dogs are allowed like we planned, but we are also not trapped by her reactivity in a life without weddings, traveling, exploring new places, and most importantly, community with other people and dogs.